Have you ever tried to talk to someone who was in a hurry, multi-tasking, or dealing with other background distractions?
Have you ever engaged in a conversation and wondered whether the person was listening to you or if it was worthwhile to continue speaking?
How did that make you feel?
We can express a real interest in others by:
✰ Having a welcoming posture
✰ Making eye contact
✰ Giving yes signals (nodding)
✰ Taking notes
✰ Asking follow-up questions
If time or other commitments are a factor, acknowledge your interest in speaking to the individual and establish a time when you can give your undivided attention. Wouldn’t you want the same for yourself?
In business, you may talk about your role (I’m a consultant). In life, you may talk about your role (I’m a mother).
Quick exercise: Describe yourself with a one-word adjective that starts with the same sound of your first name. I’ll go first, Radiant Ramona.
Now, the image we see of ourselves is not always the image the rest of the world sees.
Understanding how we are wired and the impact it has on other people requires operating from a conscious level. Too often, we navigate life on a subconscious level, making assumptions without getting to know the otherness of the other.
We have millions of patterns in our subconscious brain that determine how we interact with others. If we don’t challenge them through consciousness, things happen to us. We think we have no control over it, but we do.
We can have a new thought, at any time, about anything in our lives that we would like to be different. It starts with knowing you, knowing others, and understanding how to adapt and connect.
“Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.” ~Carl Jung
With so many shifts happening throughout the world, there are some things that withstand the test of time: Life’s Lessons. What lessons can you add to the list? Part 1 of 2.
1. Choose work that is in harmony with your values. 2. Commit yourself to constant self-improvement. 3. Don’t waste time grieving over past mistakes. Learn from them and move on. 4. Judge your success by the degree that you’re enjoying peace, health, and love. 5. Live your life as an exclamation, not an explanation. 6. Seek opportunity, not security. A boat in a harbor is safe, but in time, it’s bottom will rotten out. 7. Be decisive even if it means you’ll sometimes be wrong. 8. Take charge of your attitude. Don’t let someone else choose it for you. 9. Start meetings on time regardless of who’s missing. 10. Improve your performance by improving your attitude. 11. Every person that you meet knows something you don’t; learn from them. 12. Do not expect others to listen to your advice and ignore your example 13. Do the right thing, regardless of what others think. 14. Give as much attention to what is positive in your life as you do the challenges. 15. Don’t dismiss a good idea simply because you don’t like the source.
Our brains are hardwired to resist change because change can be difficult. Habits, routines, and learned behaviors make adjusting difficult at the individual level, and hard, if not impossible, at the organizational level.
Many organizations are bogged down by complacency and a lack of awareness of how to change. While change starts with individuals, the companies they work for also need to change to survive. People want to be aligned with purposeful organizations that are collaborative and inclusive, as well as socially and environmentally responsible.
Whether change takes the shape of a new system or process, or a complete overhaul of the way things function at the core level, driving lasting change is easier said than done.
Nearly half of our daily activities are habitual. We don’t think about them, yet we subconsciously do them. For example, waking up and instinctively grabbing our phone to check our email or social media. Think back across the last hour. What have you been doing? What part is habitual?
Understanding the components of habits (trigger, action, reward) helps us understand why behaviors emerge, what reinforces them, and how we can unlearn or replace them.