Food For Thought Friday

💡 We are what we remember.

💡 The most valuable thing you have is your attention.

💡 You can’t prepare for the future if you don’t remember the past.

💡 The great obstacle in life is often ourselves.

💡 Who are You? What do you do? Who do you do it for? Why do you do it?

💡 Your direction is more important than your speed.

💡 Failing is a byproduct of trying to succeed

💡 How are you helping others grow?

💡 Everybody is an expert in something.

💡 All experiences are individual no matter how similar they may seem.

Image: Fabrik Brands

Core Qualities

Our core qualities are effortless. It’s partly nature and nurture. They color what we see, how we behave, our interactions, etc. If we can express these core qualities in our work and daily life, we probably feel good. In actuality, it may be difficult not to exude these qualities.

What comes along with our core qualities? Consequences.

⚠ The first consequence is our pitfall. Too much of something good can have an adverse effect. If determination is our core quality, pushiness may be our pitfall.

⚠ The second is our challenge. Not being pushy requires patience. Interestingly, we often look for our challenge outside of ourselves (E.g., A patient partner).

⚠ The third is too much of our challenge becomes our allergy. Some people are so incredibly patient it may come across as passiveness. Determined people are allergic to passiveness.

The Core Quadrant can help us understand our idiosyncrasies.

For example, if your child or mate is your challenge, the consequence is that they are also your allergy.

Being able to identify and look beyond what unnerves us helps us see the beauty and value of others.

Adapted: Daniel Ofman – YouTube

Who Are You?

How well do you know you?

How well do you know other people?

Who are you?

In business, you may talk about your role (I’m a consultant). In life, you may talk about your role (I’m a mother).

Quick exercise: Describe yourself with a one-word adjective that starts with the same sound of your first name. I’ll go first, Radiant Ramona.

Now, the image we see of ourselves is not always the image the rest of the world sees.

Understanding how we are wired and the impact it has on other people requires operating from a conscious level. Too often, we navigate life on a subconscious level, making assumptions without getting to know the otherness of the other.

We have millions of patterns in our subconscious brain that determine how we interact with others. If we don’t challenge them through consciousness, things happen to us. We think we have no control over it, but we do.

We can have a new thought, at any time, about anything in our lives that we would like to be different. It starts with knowing you, knowing others, and understanding how to adapt and connect.

“Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.” ~Carl Jung

Adapted: Scott Schwefel | TEDxBrookings

Speak Up

How often do we say what we think?

What is the risk if we do?

Many people feel they will be judged or face consequences if they say something that goes against popular opinion.

So they offer up something politically correct or adopt a code of silence.

👉 How does this play out in the workplace?

Imagine having a manager who notoriously assigns pressure-filled deadlines. Team members are stressed but are hesitant to speak up because the manager’s philosophy is those who cannot handle the pressure don’t belong in the role. Silence makes the situation worse. Team members feel powerless, and complaining becomes commonplace.

When we don’t speak up, it can give the appearance of approval.

There are certainly times when we should be silent, but other times when we need to get out of our comfort zones and say something.

Adapted: FS Brain Food No. 388

Commitment

Dear Leaders and Managers,

Are you committed to creating a culture of trust and collaboration?

If you answered yes, when was the last time you asked your team members:

✔ What are two to three things I can do differently to improve my leadership?

✔ How can I make our working relationship more effective?

✔ How are things going for you since we last spoke?

✔ What are the biggest challenges you’re facing?

✔ How can I support you?

✔ How’s the morale around you?

✔ How aligned do you feel with the company mission, vision, values?

✔ What is the most fulfilling aspect of your job?

✔ Are we providing enough growth opportunities for your role? If not, what’s missing?

✔ What’s something you want the C-Suite to know about you?

✔ What is one thing about our product or service you would improve?

We depend on people to help move our companies forward. When there is an absence of trust and collaboration, people are less willing to come together and often make disappointing progress.

It makes sense to have an authentic curiosity about the people we are delegating responsibilities to and to provide a safe environment to give/receive genuine constructive feedback.